How You Should Approach the Adversity in Your Life

You know, the older I get, I think to myself– Ralph, what did you think? Life’s never meant to be a smooth ride. Anyone who says that we’ve lived a great life, they say it even after everything they’ve been through and seen. I’ve been through a fair bit of hot water myself–more times than I can count.

Sometimes I think it’s my fault and at others, I feel like it’s the fault of others that these things happened to me–in moments of clarity, I think to myself that I should just acknowledge that it’s happened instead of pointing fingers because it doesn’t help anyone. Pointing fingers distracts me from the important questions and sort of pushes away the thought of how I can overcome my trials.

Finding the Strength to Take Action

Whose fault it was that certain things have happened to us isn’t the important question–instead, you should consider why turned out the way it did.  Asking why is perhaps one of the most powerful questions anyone can ask. This question demands the truth of the questioner–to provide a justification for their decisions and tasks. It’s only when you get an honest answer–that’s when you find some sense of peace and the will to move on from hardship.

Finding the Strength to Take Action

Above else, it will help you diagnose the problem and take the steps needed to find a way out of your predicament. One thing that’s helped me over the years are the 3Rs:


See what the lay of the land is like. Take a long hard look at the chain of events that led to the position you found yourself in and where you stand right now. Don’t be afraid of where you are because fear is the enemy of grace and makes us act in all sorts of destructive ways–what we need to do is pick out the least path of resistance, like a tiger moving in on its prey and pounce when the time is right.


Once you have a firm grasp over your circumstances, see where your opportunities lie and what your strengths are. Is there someone you can reach out to? Maybe you can take steps in your personal capacity to find a way out.


Once you have a fair idea of what the possibilities are—reorganize your available resources to develop an effective plan of action. Ever seen people play chess? Strategize and think about how you should place your chess pieces in a way that you can overcome your struggle in a blaze of glory.

Above all else–never, ever lose faith in yourself and your capabilities. As Marianne Williamson once said:

“Our Deepest Fear Is Not That We Are Inadequate. Our Deepest Fear Is That We Are Powerful Beyond Measure.”

I’m Ralph Sanders and I Stand With You

I’m Ralph Sanders and I Stand With You

From looking at 350 years in jail to racial prejudice and slander—I sometimes think I’ve seen more than one lifetime should force anyone to go through. But I’ve been through it all and I can help you overcome your adversity as well. Feel free to speak with me and together we’ll face your struggles head-on.

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